Men follow Angelina Jolie in The Tourist. Men and cameras. They follow her — chic, coiffed, assless — through the streets of Paris. They follow her onto the train to impossible, floating Venice, where she heads on the instruction of her shadowy, fugitive lover. Eventually, they follow fellow passenger Johnny…
Department stores at the mall don’t speak to your personal brand of flair. Gifts created en masse are anything but thoughtful. And the crowd champing for the clearance rack at various Sawgrass outlets seems to evoke sad comparisons to a cattle drive. Sure, you’re on a budget, but does your…
Rock-bottom expectations are rewarded, sort of, in this update of Hanna-Barbera’s necktied ursus, which hopes to outdo the live action/computer animation success of the Alvin and the Chipmunks franchise by adding one more dimension. Yogi (who debuted in 1958 and was loosely based on The Honeymooners’ Ed Norton) is voiced…
The family model featured in Goldie, Max and Milk, a new comedy at Florida Stage, would make Dan Quayle choke on his own vomit. Max is both a single mother and a lesbian. She has little idea how to breast-feed her 4-day-old child. In comes Goldie, a “lactation consultant” and…
The Golden Age of Hollywood produced actual demigods. The silver screen imbued the stars with impossible glamour. But the studio system was no heaven: It overworked and disposed of actors and churned out movies in the brutal fashion of an assembly line. Perhaps that’s why so many photos of stars…
Like the Supreme Court justice who knew pornography when he saw it, I know punk when I see it, and punk in all its messy glory is at the dark heart of “Raymond Pettibon: The Punk Years, 1978-86,” now at the Schmidt Center Gallery at Florida Atlantic University in Boca…
If sharks ran the world a “shark petting and aquarium feeding” might consist of a shark ordering a large human happy meal, eating it, and then going home to his significant shark lover and getting a back scratch and a foot rub. Thankfully, that scenario will never happen, but you…
Filling the hole left by the closing of O’Hara’s on Las Olas, Blue Jean Blues brings a piece of upscale New Orleans to Fort Lauderdale. The happy hour, which is from the time the doors open until 7 p.m., is a good deal whether you’re here pregaming, waiting for the…
Art Basel’s satellite fairs have been growing for years and have spread across Miami like the world’s most fetching fungus. Without doubt, there’s something to satisfy every artistic temperament: cautious newcomers, counterculture rebels, and highbrow connoisseurs. So here, then, are our top ten alternates to the Convention Center. 1. Red…
Florida Atlantic University opens a new movie house this week that quite simply may become South Florida’s home to independent cinema. The Living Room has four theaters that seat 50. Indie, foreign, and classic films will show every weekend. A café will serve gourmet food, coffee, beer, and wine. And…
A very, very loose and highly symbolic adaptation of The Tibetan Book of the Dead, Gaspar Noé’s Enter the Void is both a lame fusion of stoner lifestyle, sexual fetish, and philosophical inquiry and a technical achievement that can’t be as easily dismissed. Oscar (Nathaniel Brown) is a young, drug-dealing…
In her recent English-speaking roles, 50-year-old bilingual Kristin Scott Thomas has gamely endured the fate of most actresses her age, cast as the fretful mother of Natalie Portman and Scarlett Johansson in The Other Boleyn Girl and the pinched, sexless guardian of Aaron Johnson’s John Lennon in Nowhere Boy. Her…
“All Brazilians know how to dance,” says the mother of one of the two ballet students at the heart of Only When I Dance. “It’s in our blood.” No one who has seen YouTube’s latest darling — a Brazilian baby working some serious samba moves — could disagree. Making a…
A Bill Parcells-led team has not won a playoff game since the Clinton administration. He’s notorious for moving from one organization to the next on a whim, left the Cowboys a mess, and is routinely given way too much credit for the Giants teams he coached (but was built by…
Americans have marathons for every cause, charity, pet, and ailment known to humankind. But sometimes, like around the holidays, it’s nice to get off your feet and take it easy. And let’s face it, not everyone was born to run — some of us were born to ride! Presented by…
The Miami Heat-hating media (as well as some incurably irrational Heat fans) love to accuse the Heat of being a “soft” team since their not-so-stellar debut to the season. And while the media fail to tell us exactly what it means to be a “soft” team (Are they Charmin soft?…
For all of the somewhat seedy images the quintessential county fair experience brings up (i.e., ride operators with pasts shadier than a centuries-old Banyan and eats sooo fried, they’d make even Paula Deen’s cardiologist blush), the Broward County Fair manages to surpass these unfavorable perceptions by sticking close to traditions…
Former WBC heavyweight champion Oliver McCall is 45 years old. But you wouldn’t know it to look at the man and his rock-hard physique. He can kill most men with his mustache. McCall is 54-10 with 37 knockouts in his career, and now he’s looking to become the oldest heavyweight…
Why don’t Jewish girls have the reputation as everyone’s favorite bad girls? Not enough plaid skirts? There’s no other justifiable explanation. Consider: Sarah Silverman, Natalie Portman, circa-1980 Goldie Hawn, and Dr. Ruth, who evangelizes the Jewish view of sex, that it’s intended for recreation as well as procreation. Add to…
A new kind of cinema is opening in Broward — a plush movie house for indie and foreign films. Living Room Theaters serves not popcorn, Coke, or processed nachos but wine and scrumptious dishes like gourmet pizza, paninis, spicy tuna hand rolls, and lemongrass flank steak skewers — served while…
The massive, glorious mall on Sunrise Boulevard is an institution of panache. Even though New Times might enter the Coral Ridge Mall more, it’s hard to argue for the underdog in terms of which venue is the greater beast of fashion: The Galleria at Fort Lauderdale is Broward County’s stylish…
The progenitors of Art Basel Miami Beach have long tentacles. So long that you can trace their suck marks all across town this week, where more than a dozen ancillary fairs have latched like remoras onto the underbelly of a bloated whale. But it’s at the Octopus’ garden at the…
