Real Fast Chicks

If you think pivots, jammers, and blockers are either nicknames for street drugs or items found only at the Hustler store, you should come to Seminole Casino Coconut Creek (5550 NW 40th St., Coconut Creek) for tonight’s roller derby bout. (And get out of the house more.) The proverbial fur…

Here’s the Golden Ticket!

We had two options: Hide five Golden Tickets to the Chocolate Factory in this week’s issue or invite every single one of you to this event. Logically, we chose the one that won’t get our racks ransacked. So behold, Saturday at 10 a.m., consider this your gray stub to enter…

Not Your Grandma’s Antiques

Antiques. I know what you might be thinking. But, hold on… antiques can be fun! Just check out the antiques/art at the 2010 Dania Beach Folk Art & Antique Festival at the Grace Café & Gallery (49 N. Federal Highway, Dania Beach). What will be in stock? Anything from Samurai…

Color Me Gurty

The Bubble is one of our best independent art/music venues in Fort Lauderdale. It is also an eclectic’s wet dream. So when we heard that an artist’s first solo show was in the works, our ears perked up. Attend a solo show at the Bubble? — don’t mind if we…

Winos Rejoice

Here comes your one chance to guzzle wine on the street without looking like a crazy wino — tonight, Latin American wineries are taking over seven blocks of Atlantic Avenue in Delray Beach. They’re offering an unlimited amount of wine paired with a smorgasbord of food from local joints. Throw…

Wacky Jackie

So Jackie Mason’s in town for a string of performances at the Improv Paradise Live (5700 Seminole Way, Hollywood). Humor aside, it’ll be an interesting study in demographics. On one hand, you’ve got a Jewish comedy legend bringing his old-school humor to Broward County, home to many a transplanted New…

Music for the Soul

Five bands will provide the sounds during Bands Rock Entertainment Presents: South Florida Citizens Unite for Haiti, starting at 11 a.m. But you need to provide the cash for a raffle ticket or two and the suggested $6 per person donation to benefit Food for the Poor. Also bring along…

Open Mic, Open Mind

There are two kinds of funk. One is the crusty kind that has likely been collecting on Rush Limbaugh’s microphone, and the other is the deep sweetness that travels through the open mic at the Funky Buddha Lounge (2621 N. Federal Highway, Boca Raton) every Wednesday night. If it’s the…

Don’t Expect Pippa Lee to Be Anything but Comatose

Rebecca Miller’s fourth feature may be the only film you’ll ever see with both Cornel West and Monica Bellucci in minor roles. But it is also immediately recognizable as the millionth iteration of a sheltered, middle-aged suburban housewife who has a slight crackup and decides she better get her ya-yas…

Tooth Fairy Review: The Rock Displays a Penchant for Lazy Comedy

It’s hard to know what Dwayne Johnson has less faith in: his talent or his audience. Though hardly a comedic dynamo, Johnson has generated laughs with his easygoing charm in forgettable studio products like Get Smart and Planet 51, appealingly undercutting his beefcake physique by letting his characters’ arrogance blow…

Extraordinary Measures Review: Like it Was Made for TV

This is the first release by CBS Films, and looks it. “Did you see Harrison Ford has a TV show coming out?” asked a friend who’d seen a prime-time commercial for Measures. Given the Movie of the Week lighting, the mistake is understandable. John Crowley (Brendan Fraser) is, for the…

Legion Review: As Cliché as Avatar, Without the Big Budget

Coming in the wake of Avatar’s cultural tsunami and its controversial take on — among other things — earth and ancestor-based spirituality, Legion is decidedly old-fashioned in its monotheistic Bible-thumping and fear-mongering. While director Scott Stewart (who penned the script with Peter Schink) obviously can’t compete with James Cameron’s mega-budget…

Turkey Treats

How much do you really know about Turkey? (The country, not the bird.) You’ve probably heard about the Trojan Wars, that the country is an archaeological goldmine, that it was the site of the Ottoman Empire, and, well, that belly dancers are sexy. But what about the food? The culture?…

The Habs and Habs Not

When hockey fans list the teams that have disappointed so far this season, the Montreal Canadiens don’t come to mind. That’s because Montreal’s beloved Les Habitants, or simply the Habs, weren’t expected to do much, really, and so far they’ve played to that as a middling to lower-tier team in…

Heat, Snuffed

The Heat are in danger of becoming a team one play shy of greatness. At L.A., it was Kobe Bryant banking in a trey at the horn — undoubtedly the shot of the season so far in the NBA — to quash what had been a brilliant final few minutes…

The Mane Event

Are your locks limp? Is your weave worn? Wanna change your hair-don’t back into a hair-do? Girls, you’ve got to go to a Badd Hair Day at the Miramar Cultural Center (2400 Civic Center Place, Miramar) this Sunday. Unlike that hair show your sister’s friend threw together, Badd Hair Day…

Texas-sized Comedy

There’s something disturbing about small towns. Think Texas Chainsaw Massacre, Children of the Corn, or any number of horror films. (Sure, people sometimes hate on big cities as if evil lurks behind every tall latte at Starbucks — but that’s a totally different kind of evil.) Yet what makes hillbilly…

Irresistable Temptation

South Florida’s been pretty cold lately, huh? But we’ve got a way for you to turn up the heat on this freeze. Check out the modern-day French cabaret at Passion Nightclub at the Seminole Hard Rock Hotel & Casino (1 Seminole Way, Hollywood). Temptation features 13 powerful acts, from Broadway…

Minnesota Backwood Punx

You’d think South Florida would have enough punk bands to go around that Propaganda (6 S. J St., Lake Worth) wouldn’t have to import one for some time — but apparently when it comes to country punkabilly, this area falls a bit short. So, Propaganda reached out to the Minneapolis-based…

Real Live Super Troupers

Nobody’s mastered the art of the beer-swilling, pot-smoking, girl-chasing comedy like Broken Lizard, the improv troupe behind the movies Super Troopers, Beerfest, and the grossly underappreciated ’80s-style slasher comedy Club Dread. More than anyone else, these five men — millions of Super Trooper fans know them as Farva, Mac, Rabbit,…

Only for Shakespeare

“Thy husband is thy lord, thy life, thy keeper, thy head, thy sovereign…” So, OK, Taming of the Shrew is not the favorite Shakespearean work of feminists the world over — but then again, the Elizabethans weren’t exactly known for their sense of equality or their liberal attitude. But sometimes,…